Annoying stereotypes -- 27.2.2006

What is it with people that they think they know everything about doctors' work? Somehow most seem to think that every doctor faces chopped-up people, big wounds, cut-off limbs, blood, blood, blood and bodies in their work. They don't get it that there are many doctors who have never seen a patient during their career. They could sit their days in a lab and do research on drugs. There are those who face only people with just a normal cold or flu. Then there's the small minority of doctors who sometimes might see someone who's badly hurt. And those who see chopped-up bodies are mostly pathologists. It's always a choice to work with these cases. I'm not afraid of the blood. I'm afraid of the terror that has caused some bad injuries. I'll never have to see them if I don't want to. I could just safely become a rich gynecologist like I've planned and treat barren women at a fertilization clinic.

The other problem of becoming a doctor seems to be the education. I don't like to watch bodies even in horror films. "You can't become a doctor if you can't stand bodies." Yeah right. I hate to study Swedish but it doesn't prevent me from becoming something. It's a part of the picture and I can't do anything about it. Besides, the bodies I'll be cutting up belong to people that have bequeathed them to research. It's like donating organs. And don't question me, I've checked it. I won't be seeing beaten-up women or drowned children. So stop thinking you know something and leave me alone!

I've placed a bet with mom. She thinks I'll get fat during this spring as I'll be home studying for the matriculation exams and I'll have access to the fridge 24/7. So If I gain weight over five kilos, I'll wash all the windows in the house. And that's a lot: last time it took me forever to do it.  If I'll gain weight less than 2,5 kilos (the amount that my weight could vary by just eating before weighing) or stay the same, she'll buy me a couch for my new apartment at the end or summer. She won't stand a chance. I just have to see that I don't go to the gym too often to gain too much muscle, which weighs more than fat. I'll just have to stick to aerobic exercise and keep my hand off of cheese.

Merry Christmas and a happy New Year -- 30.12.2005

So I haven't been in the mood for writing for a long time. I played a solo at Malmitalo in our Christmas concert so that the young flutists could see what they could become, or so my teacher told me. I would've rather played for them privately, although, the school wouldn't have payed for a professional accompanist, if they didn't benefit from me somehow. Anyway, I was so nervous I played poorly and had to lean on the piano to keep my balance, but I hope the audience didn't notice.

Now that it's Christmas and grandma's constantly complaining about her health, I've collected my grandmothers' traditional Christmas recipes and prepared a few things for this year. My cousin Mira, Nelli and I built a gingerbread house for the first time by our selves. It came out pretty well. The last time I built one, I did it with Jenni and we messed around with the sugar so that our church looked like a haunted house.

I have just a week to do my homework for spring. I just don't get it why some of the teachers gave us work for Christmas vacation. They don't call it a vacation for nothing. Now I'll have to do two Latin matriculation exams, three preliminääri exams in math and about 2,5 kilograms of preparing material for the prep course to med school. I won't be surprised if I'm deeply depressed by the end of school. I have only less than 30 schooldays left and I feel like I know absolutely nothing about forest ecology or even organic chemistry.

I think my Italian cypress bonsai is dead. I scratched a layer of bark off of it today, and it's just brown, not green like it's supposed to be.

November -- 20.11.2005

We finally got the matriculation examination results. I got an L (the best score) from English and a C from Swedish. I'll redo the Swedish test in spring, because the score was just two points below an M, the higher score. Basically I lost most of my points because we had to write three letters, not an essay, in the end. I wasn't familiar with the formalities and got about 20 points less than usual.

I'm getting a bit nervous about Christmas and I have tons of homework and school work before exam week. I've started a new morning routine, so I could sleep as late as I can. This new routine doesn't include a big breakfast, a shower or doing my hair. I only throw it up on a pony tail. Next term isn't much better. I have seven courses, all from which I can expect a lot of work from. They're supposed to prepare us for the spring matriculation examination. I get the feeling that my reason for living is those tests and I'll have to wait until March for them.

It hasn't even snowed, but it's cold and dark and I'm trying to calm down for the holidays and the school break I'll spend doing exercises on biology. All the effort won't necessarily even be of any use. Mom complains that I don't write here often enough. That's because I have nothing new to write about.